In my last post I hinted at a “devastating two-pronged bid” to reclaim my Kitten King title, starting with the exciting Daily Kitten service. Ever since I’ve been receiving e-mails from frustrated kitten worshippers desperate for news of the second part of my fiendish plot*, but I’ve had to embargo the press release for fear of the impact it might have on the stock market.

Until now, that is. Now I’m thrilled to be able to introduce the most devastating development in kitten technology since the self-cleaning litter tray. I give you… wait for it… Kittenwar.

It’s utterly fantastic.

I should actually point out that although the site was my idea, it was 100% constructed in the North of England by legendary coding boffin Tomsk. I merely stood on the sidelines waving my arms hopelessly about while he buried himself in stuff I don’t understand. So hats off to he.

*not actually true.


  1. Damn. I was expecting genuine cat fights. Nigella Lawson vs Sarah Beeny, that kind of thing.

    Sort it out, Fraser!

  2. Who is Sarah Beeny? What about Siouxsie Sue instead.

  3. Sarah Beeny has massively pert breasts and presents some sort of program. It may be about houses. Although I’ve always been too distracted to notice.

  4. RecklessPrincess

    I got sent a link for Kitten Wars, and had to come over just to make sure it WAS your doing…

    Like it!


  5. How do you submit kittens??

  6. Russ, you can’t submit kittens at the moment, sorry. I’ve had to suspend bits of the site because it’s been so popular and it chewed up too much processor time. We’ll have the submissions page back up soon though, I promise.

  7. Yes. What Tomsk said. We’re victims of our own kitten success.

  8. sarah does this work

  9. hi aileenacosta my friend

  10. cats are smashed faces egg head

  11. canyou get my messagesall the time?

  12. aillen do you like cats and kittens??????????

  13. steevi isn’t on this place????

  14. oh ya she is isn;t she look.

  15. this is kind of borring lets go on another sight

  16. steevi is lokind for a place where the8 comments are

  17. people this in not aim okay get it right people!!

  18. Hello, a really interesting experience to visit your website. For sure i will come back soon. greets to all !

  19. My site is somewhat more artificial, but I hope you will like it…


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