pig’s feet

It must be great to work with me. Apart from the professional pleasure one must surely derive from sharing oxygen with one of the UK’s most minor web celebrities, one gets to play guinea pig for my exploits in the kitchen. This week it was Golden Apple and Raspberry Streusel Tart, last week saw my colleagues chow down on Chocolate Mocha and Baileys Pie, while the previous Monday my Sweet Potato Cheesecake made its debut. How they must love me.

Yesterday, one of them decided to demonstrate this love with the gift of food, and bought in some pig’s trotters for me to road test. What’s more, he’d already prepared these porky prizes, glazing them in the manner suggested by our old friend Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall in his recipe for oh-so-sticky spare ribs.

My colleague reports:

The recipe is taken from ‘Meat’, except I didn’t use ribs and sauteed in butter instead of oil. Whilst the trotters took 2 1/2 hours, the sauce took another 3-4. Hugh’s watch is broken perhaps – this is not the first time I’ve ended up cooking into the night because of his dreamy estimates.

Cut the trotters in half length-ways, at the joints and once at the bone. The idea is to make bite-size pieces you can roll around in your mouth. Wield a very big cleaver (wear goggles to enhance the effect) or have your butcher do it. Rinse & dry trotters to remove bone fragments.

That’s it!

And the taste? Despite being reheated in the microwave (sadly, our office kitchenette lacks an Aga hob), these porcine parcels were a delight; succulent, fatty and dripping with glorious, gummy goodness. Highly recommended, and well worth the hours spent in preparation.

If anyone else would like to cook up some kind of magnificent food and have me review the results, please get in touch. I’ll be here all week.


  1. Sod that. When do we get the good news/bad news?

  2. When I’m good and ready.

  3. I’m sticking with my ‘there is no good news/bad news’ idea. I’m a good news/bad news atheist, if you will.


  4. Considering the extreme sweetness of the parsnips currently available in our local grocers, we were considering making some into a dessert. Fancy it?

  5. My mother used to cook pig’s feet when I was
    little. And rabbits, pigeons, horses, snails, plus
    other meaty oddities. You would have loved it.

    Myself, I used to screech and cry until blue.

  6. I made some oxtail stew the other day. It was very nice, but takes about 6 hours to make. Which is a tad too long. Should’ve taken pictures..

  7. You dirty bastard.

  8. Chocolate Mocha and Baileys Pie AND Sweet Potato Cheesecake?
    Look. I only work about 5 mins away.
    You never write, you never call…


  9. Chocolate Mocha and Baileys Pie?

    *rubs thighs*

  10. Thighs?

    *rubs chocolate mocha & baileys pie*

    I dunno about Oxtail…I cant fathom the idea of eating something that has been shat on through its entire existence….

  11. Stinkus Dinkus – if sweet parsnips are available you can’t go far wrong with making … Parsnip Liqueur!

    Yes – many would have you beleive it to be vile, but you’ll have to take my word for it until you try.

    Brew parsnip wine as per any old recipt circa 1903, then freeze distil using a large heavy plastic bag.

    Honestly – it’s dead good.

  12. Sharyn – do you eat sausages? Their casing has been shat *through* for its entire existence.

  13. I heat frozen pizza.
    But only for the ladies.

  14. *shuts eyes, sticks fingers in ears and sings loudly*

    It’s a fair cop, Slinky, I love a good sausage and a nice peppery black pudding. Actually doing a 3-bean sausage casserole with chipolatas tonight, so thanks for the imagery ;0)

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  16. That caff book is shit. What kind of moron goes round the country eating crappy builders food then gets all twee about it? Send your trained cat slaves to off him, Fraser.

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