i am unworthy of your readership

I’ve turned into tabloid rent-a-quote scum. This is from today’s Daily Star newspaper:

And now I despise myself, and so should you.


  1. …and this is the part where i flash my Ugly American membership card and say “what’s a chav?”

  2. RecklessPrincess

    I hope you went and had a shower after posting that!

  3. As a sociologist I question your dubious scientific-realist methodology but must admit your findings are hard to argue against.

  4. Dirty boy.
    A chav lad who works with one one of my mates plays drum & bass (bum & face) in the weekends, had been trying to decide whether to call himself DJ Black Tower, or DJ White Lightning. And he’s SO serious. Kill me now. He may as well call himself ‘DJ a Pint of Stella and a Happy Slap in the Girl’s Loos’. If any of our US cousins dont know what drum & bass is, it goes like this… BFFff.. BFFfff.. BBFFff.. BBFFFff.. mmm-ch.. mmm-ch.. mmm-ch.. mmm-ch.. WAAAP.. WAAAP.. WAAAP.. WAAAP.. etc. But its probably infected the whole planet by now. Holy crap, ‘S’ isnt too dissimilar from my name…..

  5. “I spent the whole day walking along in full chav gear”.

    Come on Fraser, show us the pictures.

  6. Heh. Chavs.

    Saw an ad for the lab on the bus into work yesterday. But only just. Glanced at it while getting off and only just had time to work out what it was for. Had I not known about the lab already I’d have been totally baffled.

  7. Agreed. They’re not exactly the clearest of adverts.

  8. Yes, let’s see the snaps. Someone must have had their cameraphone handy.
    On the excellent Freakonomics site, devoted to Steven Levitt’s ludicrously Fraser-friendly book, there’s a list of the ‘whitest’ and ‘blackest’ names for American children. My nipper is terribly pale, you know…

  9. Foccacia? Are you *sure*? If i said that word round here no one’d know what i was talking about. The rest of the names would go down a storm though.
    And yes – c’mon. Show us your pics.

  10. “I christen this child Platini Cruyff Merckx Moulinex “, recently heard in the church of Josh, Olly,and Emma.Is this the thin end of the wedge?

  11. I reckon Foccacia wouldn’t be too likely. Fo-Katya might, though.

  12. I am now in blogjam hell…. Just managed to get to the site via Sexpot or Despot (that’s Wannado search for you). I now find myself serenaded by the Fraser infused Carmina Burana only to find out that he now dresses as a Chav. Wouldn’t have done that with the long hair, methinks. And can he and his choir shut the fuck up????

  13. Sorry, just realised. The words to the oratario clearly state ‘eat pork, ate pork’. I now appreciate it as the usual kind of blogjam subtle publicity stunt for Pork pies past and future…….

  14. What the check does “chav” mean?

  15. I can’t believe the name under H is Harvey. aggggghhhhhh! –> i’m not a chav honest! Gotta dash, just on the phone to DPOLL!!

  16. oh. my. god. my son is a chav.

  17. I get it now. We have those in the US too.

    We call them Wiggers.

  18. Actually, I don’t think Wiggers are the same as Chavs – we have Wiggers (White Niggers) here too. AFAIK, a Wigger is a white man trying to be a black man. A Chav (aka Pikey) is different. Burberry gaps, gold jewellery and Kappa trainers. Thinks he’s cool. The female variety tends to be fat. And a complete slapper. Probably drives a Vauxhall. Speaking of which, check out http://www.barryboys.co.uk for some truly frightening chav motors.

  19. thought better of you Fraser.. taking the piss out of the working class? Who next, those foreign types??
    (hello by the way!)

  20. You need to stay in more.

  21. Foccacia is easy to explain – think back a year or so to the McMakeYouSick adverts that were running – Ladies Wot Lunch!

    This has made me really concerned about my brother who is without a doubt a complete chav (fortunately I moved away from Hemel Hempstead (Chav Heaven) over five years ago so didn’t catch it).

    He has just found out his girlfriend is pregnant, heaven knows what they will call their child – knowing him probably Wella or Stella or something equally strange.

    But then of course I am in no place to criticize, my wife is a bit of a (as Cartman would say) Tree Hugging Hippie.

    My oldest is called Oceana-Skye and my youngest Jaden-Taylor.

  22. Charlotte Painter

    I would just like to tell you all that my supervisors nephew is called Harley-David Brown, and NEICE Billy-Jo Brown. Oh dear! She, my supervisor however, does not approve (for the record).