Archive for July, 2004

cunt vs kittens

I’ve decided to mark the continued success of the Random Kitten Generator by giving it its own domain, www.cutelittlekittens.com. I’ve also been studying the search terms used by people coming to blogjam via Google, and they make for somewhat interesting reading. So far this month, people have used 5075 different search terms in finding this site, and the top twenty (apart from one or two obvious exceptions), are all varying combinations of the words ‘kittens’, ‘pictures’ and ‘cute’. Close examination of the statistics suggests that kittens are, as a percentage of overall search terms used, 59 times more popular than cunt. This, I feel, reflects well on the power of kittens and on the health of the Internet itself. It’s not all sleaze, you know.

kitten updates

A collection of some recent kitten related e-mail:

I love the random kitten generator. I’ve been visiting it for at least a year. It seems as though the kitties haven’t been updated in a while though. Do you have plans for updating it? Do you take submissions? Copyright requirements?

Thanks,

Ben

Thanks for the kind words, Ben. The random kitten generator is always willing to accept new photos – in fact I’ll shortly be adding an “upload your own kitten” feature. As far as copyright goes, there aren’t any restrictions – but if someone asks for an image to be removed I’m happy to oblige.

Update: I have now added an upload feature to the kitten page. Thanks to Tomsk for tweaky codey stuff.

I love your kitten generator and was wondering if you ever take pictures from people for it. I have 3 lovely kitties and some pretty darn cute pics I would love to share if you take them. if not, oh well.

Midgy

Send ‘em my way, Midgy. A word of warning, however – my cute standards are extremely high, and many submitted pictures simply do not make the grade. And no fully developed cats.

i would like to know how i can buy one of the kittens that i saw in your column. it is the one where there are three orangeand white kittens and one gray and white kitten. i am new and don’t understand how to purchase a kitten. plesae answer me as soon as possible.

Thank you very much.

Alyssa

I’m afraid that my site is merely a place to showcase the delights of young feline beauty, Alyssa. I suggest that you try an animal shelter to obtain a pet that really needs some love. Your IP address places you Reston, Virginia, so perhaps you could try the Fairfax County Animal Shelter at 4500 West Ox Road.

HOW DO YOU FIND THESE CUTE KITTENS, BECAUSE THERE SO SO SO CUTE

TIFFANY JOHNSON

Aren’t they just? I found the original kittens all over the Internet, but since that initial batch of 70 most of the new additions have come from members of the public. Thanks, TIFFANY JOHNSON.

Do you sell longhaired kittens?

Rachel

As mentioned above, I don’t actually sell kittens at all, Rachel. Your IP address places you in Gonzales, Louisiana, so perhaps you could try the Ascension Parish Animal Shelter at 9563 Airline Highway, Sorrento.

I’ve been looking at your site and I must say, your random Kitten generator has brought meaning to my life. I click on it all the time and even set one kitten to be my desktop so I always remember the kittens whenever I boot up. Thank you so very much. And I hope you don’t mind if I made a link to it from my little site??

Thank you again! :-D

Cain

Thanks, Cain! Of course you can link to my kittens. And thanks for the kind words – it’s very nice to be appreciated.

Why do you have so many cats? Where did you get them all? And where do they go after pictures have been taken? I’m concerned about there well being.

Thanks,

Shannon

Hi, Shannon. I don’t have lots of cats, I just have lots of pictures of cats. I often wonder what has happened to them all – and would like to think they’re they’re still gambolling innocently about, being well-fed in loving homes. Hopefully none of them have been drowned by evil-doers or mown down by big trucks!

I wanted to know do you have kittens gray and white, or just white. A boy no girl. So if you have any please give me a buz. Thankyou.

Rebecca

As mentioned above, I don’t actually sell kittens at all, Rebecca. Your IP address places you in Plano, Texas, so perhaps you could try the Operation Kindness Animal Shelter at 3200 Earhart Drive, Carrollton.

How do I make contact to purchase a kitten that is on your website? My computer does not want to cooperate. Thanks

Sue Singelyn

My own computer often does not wish to co-operate either, Sue, which is why I’ve switched to Red Hat Fedora Linux. I find it to be much less processor-intensive than Windows. With regards to buying a kitten, I’m afraid that I don’t actually sell kittens at all. Your IP address places you in Tucker, Georgia, so perhaps you could try the Forsyth County Animal Shelter at 1902 Old Atlanta Rd, Cumming.

I hope this entry has been the most useful thing ever.

nickelback

This week’s blogjam bounty from the boy Bowers is an enlightened animation examining the legacy of those pioneering ponces of grunge pop, Nickelback. I hope you enjoy its unparalled splendour.

cuntbomb

Cunt.

It’s not often that I ask you, the loyal blogjam reader, for anything, but I’m asking now. Anyone searching for the word c*nt on google is currently presented with a variety of results, including an entry from blogjam – cunt – in the top ten. I’d very much like this to continue, and would heartily recommend that everyone use the word c*nt on their own websites, linking to this page when they do so. This will influence google’s page rank algorithm and get Damon back where he deserves to be, at number one. A bit like this : cunt.

Let’s do it together. Go to work, blogjam minions. I believe in you.

bladerunner

Little known fact: When Ridley Scott filmed ‘Bladerunner’ in 1982, he based the entire movie on a small African production shot a couple of years earlier in the jungles of Madagascar. Although the original footage has been assumed lost for many years, I have discovered a short clip that proves its existance without a shadow of a doubt. The resemblance to Scott’s later masterwork is simply staggering.

bad fellas

My mate Bowers has been at it again. This time he’s been cooking pasta, using a razor to slice the garlic so thin that it liquefies in the pan. This has enabled him to come up with a glowing tribute to the genius of Martin Scorsese’s screenwriting. So keep and eye on the sauce and watch the helicopters (audio NSFW).

mission of burma

More by accident than by design, I briefly found myself in Mission Of Burma’s dressing room this evening, and was introduced to the band. While this might not mean much to well, virtually everyone, it meant a lot to me. Mission Of Burma invented 1980s American alternative music, picking up bits and pieces from bands like Pere Ubu and The Gang Of Four and paving the way for pretty much everyone who followed. No Mission Of Burma? No Pixies. No Pixies? No Nirvana. It’s as simple as that.

So anyhow, they’re still brilliant. Roger Miller wears ear-protectors and places a sheet of perspex between himself and the drum-kit (he has tinnitus, caused by playing too loud). Clint Colney looks like Al Pacino’s camp younger brother and fronts three of the best alternative tracks ever – ‘That’s When I Reach For My Revolver’ (covered elsewhere by Graham Coxon and Moby), ‘Academy Fight Song’ (covered by REM) and ‘That’s How I Escaped My Certain Fate’, while Peter Prescott is still the best singing drummer in rock ‘n roll (with the possible exception of Levon Helm). They finish with a version of The Wipers‘ ‘Youth Of America’, which is like the great lost American band covering a song by the other great lost American band. Magnificent.