pukka pies

Even the regular blogjam reader could be forgiven for assuming two things:

  1. That I only eat fancy food
  2. That I’m happy to complain about things, but am less forthcoming when it comes to handing out praise

Well, I’m happy to say that neither is quite true. Often (typically following the consumption of several pints of lager), I’m tempted to head to the chip shop for the kind of chemically imbalanced, peppered-with-additives treat that only fast food will provide, comfort grub for the alcohol-addled. Even here, though, I have standards. More specifically, I’m on the lookout for one thing: a sign advertising the presence of Pukka Pies.

I’m not precisely sure what it is about these parcels of dietary delight that mark them out as the pinnacle of popularly-priced pie perfection, but they are head and shoulders above other brands. Perhaps it’s the puff pastry crust, which never seems to suffer from the sogginess that afflicts the produce of lesser imprints. Perhaps it’s the filling. I really don’t know.

Anyway. In order to prove that point 2) above is also not typical, I decided to write to Pukka to congratulate them on their fare. And, of course, to try and blag some free stuff.

Hello.

I am a fan the Pukka Pie.

Indeed, I will not enter a chip shop unless the Pukka brand is advertised on its walls. This is the result of years of pie research – I have tried many other varieties, but only Pukka truly satisfies.

My local chippie currently features a splendid poster featuring a pie cleverly disguised as London’s Millennium Dome, under the delightful heading ‘Millenni-Yum’. It’s fantastic.

I wondered if you had a spare copy of this poster you could send me. I would very much like one to adorn the wall of my kitchen.

I’d be really grateful if you could help out with this one – I know it’s an odd request, but I really like the poster, and I love your pies.

Especially the chicken & mushroom one.

All the best,

Fraser

Within minutes, I’d received a response:

Dear Fraser

Thank you for your recent e-mail. Unfortunately we no longer produce the Millenni-Yum poster and we don’t have any stocks left. If you would like me to send you a couple of our new posters please forward me your address.

Kind regards

Chrissie Beaver
Receptionist
Pukka Pies Ltd

Tremendous. Not only did I get a rapid, positive response (Rollover Hot Dogs of Slough, please take note), but it came from the gloriously-named Chrissie Beaver. She is my new hero.

Hooray for Pukka Pies.

18 Comments

  1. just for a moment I thought she was called crispy beaver

  2. Beaver! Brilliant. In almost completely unrelated name news I had a guy at the registry today called Ali who really was a barber. Just thought I’d share that..

  3. “pinnacle of popularly-priced pie perfection” … nice alliteration, that

  4. Perhaps you might like to join me on my crusade to force Breville to restart production of the Pie Magic.

    A much-missed addition to any kitchen, I am sure you’ll agree.

  5. Heh! Beaver.
    Mm… Pie…

    (Sorry, am hung over. This is the best I can manage.)

  6. Hurray for the Beaver!

  7. They’re pies, made by a company called Pukka.

  8. pukka pies are foul…
    I has one the other day and it came complete with bony tendon bit.
    Disgusting!

    Frey Bentons are foul as well.

    Can anybody recommend a decent pie?
    Money is no object!

    • bony tendon? i doubt it very much as the meat is all hand butchered and then sorted on several occasions before it even enters the mixing or cooking procedures

  9. PUKKA Pies are PUKKA!

    The best medium sized pies bar none!

  10. Life without pies is not worth living………….

  11. Pukka is the only pie worthy of praise all day long.

  12. Shire Famous Pies make the best pies.

    Chicken Balti Pie is the number 1!!

    Most football grounds sell them, I get them at Pride Park.

    Puke Pies are awful, full of dog meat.

  13. do you have shares we could buy and how much? your pies are great by the way. the best.

  14. Hi all

    amazing how this this conversation escelated into a bit of a argument, all about a pie..

    you will find that they are both at the top of the mass produced pie sales, and they both are good.

    however i have seen pukka pies factory and been around it and there is no dog, just plenty of happy and hard working staff preparing lots of nice meat..

    also they could make better qualiity pies with the best quality beef etc,etc and make it fine dining , however are you guys prepared to pay an extra £2 for that ..

  15. pukka pies posters needed for shop front

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