I was bored, so halfway through a delicious packet of chocolate minstrels I wrote an e-mail to Masterfoods, the company who manufacture not only the aforementioned, but also M&Ms, the Mars Bar, and all sorts of other examples of classic British confectionery.
I have a great idea for a new chocolate product. You should produce some white chocolate minstrels and some dark chocolate minstrels and combine them in one packet.
The name? Black & White Minstrels.
I would buy them, and so would all all my friends.
What do you think?
All the best,
Before too long, they got back to me.
Thank you for contacting us regarding GALAXY Minstrels,
We receive many letters from the general public suggesting new and interesting ideas, together with lots of feedback and comments on our current product ranges. However, all our ideas are generated in house and through our agencies, often many years in their planning. Not all ideas are feasible due to technology restraints, and may be shelved until a future date.
We continually carry out research into the needs and requirements of our consumers and we record all the comments received on our products.
If you need any further information or advice please contact our Consumer Careline on the telephone number below and one of our Consumer Care Advisors will be more than happy to help you.
I’d be lying if I didn’t report that this e-mail didn’t make me slightly angry. While the speed of response is to be commended, the text is obviously a copy and paste job, designed to react to the widest possible range of customer suggestions without ever properly addressing an individual’s specific idea.
Honestly. The very minimum a company should do, when someone has spent literally minutes tailoring an e-mail designed explicitly to waste their time, is to respond in similar fashion.
This country is going to the dogs.